Alastor's Reflection

My Kate Bush Page

Ξ March 19th, 2008 | → 0 Comments | ∇ |

The essence of Lily Godwin…

There’s no page that can sufficiently reflect the beauty that I’ve found in Kate’s work; nevertheless, I did want to create a tribute to her here. Without Kate, my novel would never have taken form in my imagination, sprung so truthfully from my heart, or even seen its way to completion. Simply put, encountering her music, and what lies behind and beyond it, was the most singular event of my life. It all happened before I even knew it; before I ever laid eyes on her…

Being a rabid fan of Pink Floyd since its Syd Barrett days, I’d always picked up even the most tangential items I found, being a complete used-record store junkie. On March 5, 1982 (yes, I keep records of my records!) I came across “A Harvest Sampler” which, along with a Floyd track, contained Kate’s “The Man With the Child in His Eyes” from her first album. I’d always been very picky about female singers, but upon hearing this song was totally blown away. I’d never heard such range and with such heartfelt expression and emotion. It was simply beautiful.

On May 8, 1984 I found a promo copy of “Never For Ever”, which was my first full-length introduction to her material. If I’d been blown away by the earlier single, this album completely exceeded my expectations, and cemented her position as favorite female artist. From the trippy, teasing, and deceitful nature of “Babooshka”, to the shifting sands and windy imagery of “Egypt”, to the breathtaking atmosphere of “Breathing”, this truly progressive artist simply stole my soul away… my heart would come later.

An anecdote: Sometime during the next year, at a particularly despairing point in my life, I had a waking dream… It was just before dawn, in my dream, at a crescent-shaped beach of white sand, enclosed by high cliffs. A fog hung low, spread upon the water, and as I watched the skies above it bleach slowly with a sunrise still below the horizon, felt myself lifted up. I looked down and saw with some alarm that I was in the palm of a huge hand, which swept me out towards the sea, over the fog, over the white-capped waves which I could see through its fingers.

In its left hand, and coming closer, was Another, cupped inside its palm. I could see as it approached that it was a woman, bare, unafraid, and unshivering, sitting calmly, head bowed down. The huge hands met, side to side, and I beheld what was a breathless and breathtaking beauty, right next to me, undisturbed. She did not move, but her breathing moved her; dew-drops glistened in her hair like the tiniest of lights of all colors. Still she kept her face turned down, her dark hair hanging like curtains around it, or a veil. 

She held out her arm, and her fingers grew close. I could see from her fingertips an aura of rainbowed energy, like that in Kirilian photography. I tentatively moved my hand to hers, and I could see a light of my own emanating from my fingers as well. As our fingertips touched the electrifying energy expanded and spread over our bodies, leaving me with a most wonderful and filling feeling, the like of which has not been repeated. She slowly lifted her head, dark hair parting…

…and then I awoke. As time went on, and as dreams may go, I slowly allowed it into my subconscious and out of my cluttered mind…

In October of 1985, the U.S.A Network broadcast Kate’s Hammersmith Odeon concert video to celebrate her release of the Hounds of Love album. I needed something to fill a (Betamax!) tape that featured Twyla Tharp’s performance of “The Catherine Wheel” and since I vaguely remembered that Kate featured dance in her routine felt it would be a perfect fit. I had NO idea what awaited me…

Long story short: I was devastated with exhilaration! My brother, who had watched it with me, said that he’d never seen me react in such a way. Excited, entranced, and taken in, it was a completely indescribable experience. I began hunting down and buying her back catalogue from October 20 on, and listened exclusively to her well into the next year. It seemed that with every song, EVERY one, that I was discovering and connecting with something deeper than anything I’d heard to date. Deeper emotion, deeper feeling, and deeper understanding. And she awoke with a jolt my slumbering Muse, who, after invoking the poem “Arc to Arcturus” (reprinted in the Kate tribute book The Thrill and the Hurting), began to shape the tale of Unbound to which she devoted herself, and to me, possessing me entirely, happily for us both. This was just the beginning…

At some point in this period, I awoke from a dream of a dream… I can’t recall it but it was of that hand, that beach, that mystery woman. I turned over, opening my eyes, and it was as if I saw her again, but in the waking world: leaning against the near wall across from me was the back of her second album, Lionheart, with a breathtaking breathless photo of Kate, looking right out at me, tiny sparkles of light in her hair, expecting… what? A connection, to be sure; a discovery: I knew who it had to be, who it had to have been…

There’ve been so many synchronistic events between her music and my Self that I could never list them all, let alone remember. One significant one is when I finally named Lily’s character in the manuscript after using a “placeholder” name for years. In the days and moments leading up to the release of Kate’s The Red Shoes CD on November 3^rd 1993 (when I bought it), Lily Godwin was truly born.

Since the album had been long-awaited (what’s new LOL), I hastily and happily played it without reading the miniscule lyrics on the insert. Naturally, I was already jazzed to see a song entitled “Lily” on it! When it finally played I loved it right away but couldn’t figure out why Kate’s character was strolling with a small gang named Gabriel, Raphael, Michael, and Muriel. I think I assumed that she was prowling Spanish Harlem, or something.

When I finally read the lyrics I was truly mind blown, for reasons I can’t divulge, cagey character that I am. I’m only telling just so much of the novel here, although my Kate-Forum-mates have a better idea, necessarily so! Suffice to say… it was more than fitting.

Another interesting thing of note: I was house-hunting in August of 2005 for the place where I am currently living. After examining over a dozen properties I came across this somewhat isolated and antiquated but perfect “writer’s house” where I could finish up drafting the novel. One oddity present was an ancient satellite dish in the sprawling back yard, aiming up and listening for nothing, or something to come… Charmed, I signed the contract to move in the next month.

After I’d gone home, I discovered that the title for Kate’s album had been announced. It was Aerial. Aside from the significance of that name regarding yet another character from Lily’s book, was the iconic image of an aerial, or, you might say or substitute, a satellite dish, aiming for the heavens, and awaiting the transmission to come…

And with this masterpiece of hers, it did come; such an amazing, lovely, and ultimately exhilarating work! After my first listening to this wondrous and magical double CD, and as the bird-sounds faded out in its last seconds, I heard outside an owl outside, echoing those avian cooings with a hooting of its own, before it flew off into the night. A blessing if ever I’ve heard one!

These are only a few of the many little strokes, pokes, and tickles, mental, spiritual, and physical, that I’ve experienced with regard to her moving music and beneficent personage. This post doesn’t and can’t divulge the warmth, the caring, and the deepest feeling that she’s provided me and many of her fans with so much comfort and happiness over the years; it’s futile to try and describe the ineffable. I can’t recommend her highly enough, to those who dare to Feel It. To feel is what life is all about… well, here, anyway. What’s beyond can only be implied…

I’ll leave you with the video for “Lily”, which fits like a fiery glove for her gentle hand; for both of theirs… and yours?

WATCH: LISTEN: FEEL: